29 April, 2010

past my bedtime.

it happens to be a full 2 hours and 24 minutes
past my bedtime.

I'm already grumbling about having to
get out of bed so early.

but I'm learning that this weight isn't going to fall off
my bootay without a concerted fight.

so, up.I'll.get.

today I looked at images that made me sad.
relived a fight I wish I'd never had to fight.

a war I continue to wage day after day after day.

then I look at my living children
and I wonder.

"what am I giving you now
in a better way than I was before our goodbye?"

because it's either bitter or better
through these types of things.

or so I hear.

I choose better. . .
at least most days I do.

I try my darndest.
and that's all any of us CAN do in the end.

Give it VERY our best go.

we can do it.

I think.

Off to read my favorite book
then say goodnight to Wednesday.

even though it was actually gone a full 27 minutes ago.




Mike and Amie said...

"Many will keep their commitments only until the clouds appear, only until it becomes awkward, painful, expensive, unpopular, inconvenient, unfashionable, or politically incorrect. But we must be steadfast and immovable " Sister Julie B Beck (I think.:)
You are one of the commitment keepers! Good work Natalie!

Unknown said...

some days, it's just one foot in front of the other, right?

shari berry bo-berry said...

bitter or better... when you put it that way, the choice seems so easy...but I know it's not!!!

keep your chin up kid!

and i'm fighting the same issues with my bootay and not getting enough sleep...although I hear that sleep plays an integral part of weight-loss... hmmmmmm... something to think about!

Rae said...

I'm so proud to know of you. The way you fight day in and day out--your efforts count! Even when you feel they fall short. It counts.

Sarah said...

I hope you have a great summer with your touring all over and everything! Let me know if you get a spare sec in Ut. Thinking of you daily! xoxoxoxoxoxo

ps: you have lost 35 lbs since Feb. Please give your bootay a break :) Love you.

Ashley said...

Uggg I hate and dread bad days. But the good news is they don't last and things kind of magically get better. Your doing a great job. xoxox

Tasha said...

I admire your strength so much, even on the days when you feel like you have none. You are so amazing and I think about you everyday!
Love ya

Dolly said...

The thoughts shared in this comment box have inspired me tonight.

Thanks, shukran and mahalo! : )

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