30 May, 2010


I had a dream.

and I saw you.

for the first perfect time since the last.

you.were.beautiful. . .

and wearing that gray shirt and those light colored jeans.

of course.

and you were radiant.

and happy.


and I knew,
we'll be together again.

. . .

Until that beautiful day,
Gavin. . .

love him for me.

that little you.

keep him.

love him for me.

tell him stories about his mommy.

how she loved him with every ounce of her.

and more.

tell him I named him after you,
because there was no greater honor.

for either of you.

you are after all,

my gavins.

I love you with all of me.

and more.




Tell Uncle Bart I love him too.
I miss him sometimes almost as much as I miss you.


please tell him thank you.

for everything.


liko said...

there you go again, making me cry.

shelly said...

Perfect. Love you.

Kelly said...

Hugs, Natalie.

shari berry bo-berry said...

beautiful memorial...

Anonymous said...

Your posts touch my heart in a way none others do...

Thanks you for sharing a part of yourself with us.

Truly Silkes said...

I think your brother Gavin was one cool & special person. Wish I had known him. Funny thing is, whenever I listen to Jack Johnson I think of him :-)

Sara said...

So touching. Your two Gavins are together - taking care of each other.
So touching.

Amanda Peterson Photography said...

One day those dreams will come true... one day! It's just taking the right path in this game called LIFE so we will one day, WIN and be with them again!

Maren said...

Just wanted you to know that I was thinking of you and your sweet baby Gavin yesterday and praying for continued comfort and blessings for you. Your example has meant everything to me and I can't thank you enough.

I'm also an acquaintance of Sara Staker's, and she told me last week that she still gets hate mail from people condemning her for leaving Bronson in the bath. Just thought maybe some reassurance from you might help her out. Just a thought...

Brady and Rachel said...

(tears) Beautiful.

Anonymous said...

it is amazing that words, not even words said out loud, can take my breath away.

Dolly said...

Just when I thought it was safe to come over here for photography again and now I am crying.

Okay, regroup... I'll just have to push forward like you seem to do in every amazing step of your day to day.


Brooke said...

So beautiful! You speak from the heart and it is truly amazing. I love to hear you words, they are so comforting. Thank you for that. It filled my heart with joy.

Cai Graham said...

I don't know when I RSS'd you.
I am glad that I did.

You have touched my heart.

And for that - I thank you x

Cai Graham said...

I don't know when I RSS'd you.
I am glad that I did.

You have touched my heart.

And for that - I thank you x

GINA. said...

Wow. There you go again. You got me crying AGAIN. Thank you for putting the world into perspective once again.
I just wish it didn't have to be for that reason.
Hugs & Prayers*

Kristine from Canada said...

Sigh! Oh Natalie sometimes it just sucks doesn't it?
Huge hugs
Kristine from Canada

Unknown said...


Kristy said...

I stumbled on your blog back in January and your posts are so beautiful. I'm a therapist (and mother and aspiring photographer) and listen to people grieving all the time. There is no right way to grieve but there are wrong ways and I'm always comforted to read your journey coping with your horrible losses. I can tell you are a lovely person with a strong heart and beautiful faith. Thank you for sharing your story and your talents on your blog. I pray for your continued healing and comfort.
Kristy in Chicago

cfrancke said...

You are such a wonderful writer Natalie. It's Caitlin, the website chick from NYC. I am routinely impressed by the honesty and emotionally-resonating copy you produce nearly every day. I really think you should write a book, but maybe that's a talk for another day.

Be well.