Coming Soon:

Salt Lake City: $100 day!

SOLD OUT!!
Sorry if you missed the crazy train.
Next time. :)

Live in the Salt Lake City area??
For one day and one day only I'll be offering a limited number of
$100 mini shoots!

Here's the scoop:

• Monday, February 2nd 2009
• Location TBA but most likely somewhere in the down town area
• Shoots will be in 20minute increments throughout the day
  
• Shoots will yield 20 edited "photographer's favorites" which you will receive on a disk with a copyright release for printing 2-4 weeks from the time of the siting
• I will create an online gallery of any additional images from the shoot
• Pricing is good for immediate family only
  
• this is great for engagements, bridals, family portraits you name it!
  
• Pets and props welcome!!
  

Again, I'll be doing a VERY limited number of shoots,
and the slots will fill fast, so if you're interested email me at
natalienorton{at}gmail{dot} com ASAP!

See you soon!!

xo,

Natalie

PS. If you're an aspiring photographer who's interested in a 2 hour 1 on 1 to take your photography to the next level, contact me for pricing/scheduling information.

Christensen Family: Oceanside Family Portrait Session

I like these two, a lot. Enjoy some images from our mini portrait session on the Oceanside Pier.

Oceanside Family Shoot: Sneak Peek.

Off To CA!!

We're off to CA tomorrow for an entire MONTH!!
Let me know if you want to schedule a shoot. . .

In the mean time enjoy this little critter.
More coming soon. . .

Dear Natalie.

Thank you to everyone who has emailed since my most recent Dear Natalie post.
Thank you for sharing your stories, your love and your courage.

Here's one letter I received from someone named Melissa.

Dear Natalie,

I stumbled on your blog post written on 1-7-2009 and I'm sitting here lost in my tears. I don't know much about you because I just found your blog, but as soon as I read that post I knew I had to write you. I lost my brother suddenly in August. His name was Michael and mine is Melissa. When we were growing up we were the M&M gang, he was in every way my best friend. When you said that when he died that you we no longer Gavin's sister, you were just Natalie. Alone. That is exactly how I feel right now.

Now having said that I want you to know that I know Jesus in my heart and so did my brother. I have the blessed assurance that I will see him again, but the pain here on this earth in my body is so much.

I am getting to know a new me and she is strange and unfamiliar but she is who I have become.

I do not think I stumbled on your blog by accident, I know God crossed our paths. Thank you so much, I feel like I am not alone in my grief by reading your post.

Melissa

Melissa,

I don't think you stumbled across my blog by accident either.
I love this platform that allows us to connect
and draw comfort from each other from all over the world.
Thank you for sharing so openly.
My heart is truly intertwined with yours.
You are in my prayers my sweet stranger friend.
I pray that your heart will be comforted as you adjust to your new reality
and seek to find your new sense of self.

Remember, Michael is closer than you know.

With love,

Natalie

Uh Oh.

So totally close to going crazy. My "To Do Before I go to So Cal" list is out of this world. Hopefully I'll be back later today, but I'm not making any promises. WISH ME LUCK!!!

**HOW THE HECK ARE YOU SUPPOSED TO CLEAN, DO LAUNDRY, PACK, PAY BILLS ETC WITH 3 CRAZY BOYS PULLING ON YOUR ANKLES???

Digital Photography School: Editing Eyes.

Hey all y'all. My most recent post for Digital Photography School went up today on the new Post Processing Blog! Check it out: Editing Eyes: 3 Photoshop Steps to Eyes that POP.

Last Images from Maui.

For those of you who are interested, all these images were shot in manual mode (which is the norm for 98% of my work). They were also shot in jpeg and each was shot with a custom white balance setting. I also shot black and whites in camera for the first time ever.

Enjoy the last of the images from my life changing trip to Maui.

Maui Wedding Photoraphy.

Dear Natalie.

**Alert: This is wordy. So if you don't like words, which a lot of people don't, I'll see you later friend. Go hang out somewhere else for a bit. I promise to throw more pictures, and short sentences, at you ASAP.

As anyone who reads my blog knows, I lost my 21 year old brother unexpectedly a year and a half ago. He was my only sibling and my best friend. I blog about him every now and again, and because of this, every so often, I get emails from people who've suffered similar losses. I enjoy these as they make me feel connected to people who understand the path I'm on while simultaneously offering me an opportunity to reach out and offer some measure of comfort to those around me. Well today I received an email from a blog friend that I feel compelled to discuss publicly.

Linda lost her Mom in August and her Dad in October. They died only 1 month and 26 days apart! Here's a little expert from her email:

"When I read your Christmas Eve post I was a mess . . . . I’m wondering if, after you lost Gavin, you went through a creative block? I don’t seem to have any interest in picking up my camera and I LOVE my camera. I was wondering if you have any suggestions for me?"

Believe it or not, I'm asked a version of this question quite frequently. Not just from people who have experienced the death of a loved one but from other friends and strangers who have experienced life changing events of all shapes and sizes; divorce, illness, bankrupcy and so on.

For a long time I've been looking for an opportunity to share a little bit about my experience after losing Gav and I think I'd like do that here and now. . .

After Gavin died my life was a fog for a very long time. I'd have moments, days, maybe even weeks of clarity, but to be frank, I still feel just a little numb and dizzy every now and again.

In the very beginning I literally put my camera away. Not intentionally. But I did. For a couple of months survival dictated that I focus what little energy I could muster on my kids and my husband. Then unfortunately (and I'll explain what I mean by this shortly) my passion for photography came back no holds barred. As some of that initial shock wore off, I found myself literally throwing my life into photography again. This was unfortunate because I really believe that on a subconscious level I was avoiding the acute pain I felt by being as busy as humanly possible. Between my husband and my kids and everything I was doing my photography, there literally wasn't a moment left in the day to shed a tear. Because of this, I took on more than I could manage, thus relationships both personal and professional suffered, my health deteriorated, I wasn't true to myself or aware of my own needs and most importantly, that grief was never worked through along the timetable it could have been. Pain was simply suppressed.

Now this is a dual edged sword because I also really believe that photography saved my life. Having something to literally throw myself at was very healing for me. I know it seems contradictory, but its true. It gave me a way to feel competence and a sense of control over something, which was very good for me. I had a hard time opening up to anyone other than Richie, and because I was in such desperate need of release and friends I could talk to and lean on, and yet was unwilling to do so, photography stepped in a filled the gap.

My mom always says that grief is like the ebb and flow of the tide. You've got to ride it out and know that as far as it pulls from the shore, it will find its way back again. I know that this is true. I believe that there will always be an ache in my heart from the loss I've sustained. The pain will return from time to time, but I'm realizing that now the pain visits less often and that the duration is less significant than before.

Is my loss epic and greater than that of others around me?? Definitely NOT. But it's mine and it has changed me into someone different than I was. I always tell people that when Gavin died I died too. My identity changed. I was no longer Gavin's sister. I was just me. Natalie. Alone.

I started to entertain fears of my parents dying and me being alone. My roots all being torn out from beneath me. Worse I started to entertain fears of my children dying or my husband dying.

I came to learn that this is natural. I learned to acknowledge the fears as they came to the surface and then move on to other, healthier thoughts.

What did I learn from all this? Well, ultimately I learned that sometimes healing requires visiting the depths of Hell so you can literally rise from the ashes anew. Melodramatic? Only to someone who hasn't experienced it.

I also learned that every day the best you can do is to just be where you're at and know that that's OK. Give up? Um, no. Give way? Yes. I learned to love myself enough to make room for and respect the emotions I was feeling. This was perhaps one of the healthiest decisions I ever made in my entire life.

I learned that for me to overcome grief of any kind there are 3 musts.

1. I've got to get out of bed every normal working day at a reasonable hour.
2. I've got to force myself to take a shower. Showers work miracles. (I recently received a message from a grieving mother who said she hasn't showered in 6 days. I know some of us who haven't been there can't understand this. But those of us who have are nodding our heads in complete and total understanding and compassion. I found that finding the strength to just roll out of bed and turn on the faucet was often my saving grace. If you need to, you can climb right back into bed once you're done, but you've got to get up and shower. Make sure your soul knows you're still fighting for life. . . ;P)
3. I've got to pray. The real kind of prayers, where I get down on my knees and talk to God. I've got to do this consistently and genuinely, or I will not survive in a way that I'll be proud of.
   

To anyone who's hurting, YOU WILL feel peace again.
YOU WILL feel joy.
YOU WILL laugh out loud.
YOU WILL build a new life around what was and what is your identity.
YOU WILL eventually see the world in a whole new light,
with greater perspective, knowledge,
and love and gratitude for the people and things around you.
YOU WILL.

Thank you for sticking through this crazy sermon till the end, though I have a feeling only my mom is still with me. Hi mom. I love you.

But all joking aside, this post has been so healthy for me, so healing, so thank you for being a part of it.

And to Linda, I am so sorry for your loss. I wish I could tell you that your passion is right around the corner, but I can't promise you that. I do know that life has a way of coming around in the best possible way. I hope your passion and creativity returns and that you and your camera can reignite your love affair soon. But more than that I wish you love and peace in this crazy time. My arms are around you.

xo,

Natalie

DPS Survey.

Hi all,

For those of you who are lovers of DPS (Digital Photography School), be sure to hop on over and take the survey. It was designed as a way for us to "take your order" in essence for what you'd like to see on the blog in 2009. It's completely anonymous and is merely a way for us to find out who you are and what you need from us so we can better serve you.

Take the DPS survey here.

Thanks people!

Nat

Tracy and Jan Rawle: Turtle Bay Family Portraits.

How much do you wish you could hang out with this family every day?? You have no idea. They are awesome! Everything about this shoot was a complete joy. Thank you Malia for assisting! Enjoy.















Big shout out to cousin Nicole for the Rawle/Callister family referral. I had so much fun getting to know everyone in this wonderful extended family!